As humans, we observe so many things every single day. We see love, hate, kindness, and negativity. I can’t imagine the hit our physical and emotional bodies take because of each one of these things we take in. Both in a positive and negative way.
I’d like to talk about some of the things I see. Since my blog is called ‘StuffHollySees’, I think it’s important to return to the basis of why I created this blog.
Today is day two! I have to say, I’m already feeling and seeing a difference. I know it might seem impossible, but it’s true! I feel much less swollen and more confident.
Man were the muchies hitting me today! Little dreams of chocolates and ice cream were dancing around in my head. So, I practiced my willpower today and saying ‘NO!’ to myself. Today, it worked!
Today, I begin my journey to reset my body. I’ve written about the Whole30 a few times, but plan on using this blog as an accountability partner during my third successful 30 days of whole food.
Day one started off pretty easy. I prepped by creating bacon and egg breakfast muffins yesterday so I had something quick to throw in my lunch bag. However, as the day has gone on, I’m already feeling the effects of lack of sugar. My head has been killing me and I want ALL the sugar.
Have you ever had those days where you’re just like “How the hell did I get here?” I had one of those days today. I got so incredibly frustrated with almost everything. The house was a mess, the husband was mad, the dog needed things, and I just wasn’t enough.
After I got all my frustration out and settled down a bit, I was able to assess where I really was. To be honest, I didn’t like what I saw. I was angry, whiny, selfish, and just plain yucky. I’ve come to a point in my life where I need to make some big changes so I don’t stay stuck in the spot I’m in. Because the worst spot in life to be is stuck.
I’m gonna get real here for a minute. Sometimes, I’d rather just sleep. Let’s face it, life is hard, it sucks, and when dealing with my depression and bipolar, it makes sleep a valid option and a necessary evil.
I enjoy writing based on relevant and timely personal experience. This past weekend threw me way off balance. It takes me by surprise! I could be going along, making forward progress and then WHAM!, change happens.
I’m gonna throw some love out there. So many of my posts are about dealing with sticky situations that aren’t necessarily positive, so I thought I’d talk about a truly bright part of my life.
My therapist is my devil’s advocate, my friend, my rock, and my stepping stone. I find so much value in my sessions with her and found myself wanting to dive deeper into why I get so much out of these sessions and whether anyone else might feel the same way.
Whether it’s healthy or not, who knows. It works for me. There’s something deep-seeded and primordial that lives within me. And in order to relieve that pressure, I use various forms of therapy to help. One of those forms of therapy is listening to deep, throaty, guitar-heavy, angry, passionate music. It’s like I’m a pressure cooker, and filling my ears with this glorious noise releases the steam.
I’ve been silent for a while. Part of me hates that, part of me knows I needed it. Breaks, regardless of what they are from, are key to a healthy lifestyle for me.
Due to med changes and brain chemistry alignments, my depression has reared it’s ugly head yet again.
This is the kind of depression that I had when I was first diagnosed, and just getting on medication. So, it’s ugly and angry. And all I can do is keep fighting. It’s a silent battle. One I don’t like to talk about because it makes me feel weak. It’s a battle that is raging in my head while on the outside I seem… fine.